JACK FELL DOWN
by Sidney McCabe
© 2000
CHAPTER 9
Lou watched the shadow of her bare feet glide back and forth over the floorboards as she rocked gently on the porch swing. The sun was meandering down over the horizon on an unseasonably warm, early autumn day, and she was waiting for the Kid to return from Apple Ridge. He had been gone four days now, and surely he was on his way back with news of Jack, or maybe Jack herself. Lou was anxious to know one way or the other. Jack's letters had faltered after barely a month, and not a week went by when Lou did not pray that word would come from her friend, explaining why.
It had been three months now since Lou had last heard from her; three
long, eventful, heartbreaking months. Until then Lou had made excuses
as to why she had not heard from Jack, imagining a heavy work load, or
heaven forbid another infirmary. But when Lou's letter informing Jack
of Ike's death was never answered, when Jack didn't show up for the funeral
of someone she had grown to care for so deeply, Lou knew without a doubt
that something was wrong. It was only now that the others were willing
to listen,
and Teaspoon had agreed to send the Kid out to Apple Ridge. Even Jimmy
had waved Lou's fears aside, assuring her that despite her frailties,
Jack knew how to take care of herself. Cody tried to convince her that
Jack had probably had a run the week of Ike's funeral and been unable
to make it, and Buck, who was so crushed by his friend's murder that he
was barely functioning, was angry at what he saw as Jack forgetting those
who had taken her in when she had no one, forgetting the kindnesses Ike
had always shown her. Nothing anyone said could get through to him.
For his part, Jesse was perplexed by what exactly this Jack person
meant to everyone. He had heard stories about her, and seen the grins
spread across Lou's pretty face when she talked about Jack, and the funny
way Hickok's face softened when someone mentioned her name, and the fatherly
way Teaspoon spoke of her, as he spoke of them all. Now everyone was acting
so strangely since Ike's death, and Jesse just couldn't understand it.
He'd liked Ike, of course, and been saddened by his death, and he felt
sad when he looked at Ike's now-empty bunk or passed by the stall of Ike's
horse, but it still confused him to see the way everyone around him was
acting so differently from what he'd grown used to. His ma had told him
long ago that grief made people feel like doing and saying things they'd
never think of doing or saying otherwise, and now Lou, who
Jesse had always considered as level-headed and smart as she was pretty,
was
hell-bent on finding this Jack girl.
It grew darker and Kid did not appear on the horizon. The air was
growing chilly and Rachel called her into supper, but still Lou did not
budge from the swing. She wrapped the blanket around her shoulders and
thought of the letter she had written to Jack after Ike was murdered.
'I can't help thinking that this is only the beginning of bad things to
come,' she had written. 'Kid says it's not like me to think like that,
but I can't help it, Jack. I know that one day I am going to have say
goodbye to everyone I love, in some way or another, and so much sooner
than I had ever expected. This talk of war is growing stronger, and the
men in town say every day that by next year we'll all be firing upon our
own countrymen. I can't imagine such a world, Jack. I know that the last
of any childhood I have held onto died with Ike. I can never look at the
world in the same way
again.'
Her lids began to droop over her eyes and the cool wind nipped at
her cheeks and nose. She was awakened by Jimmy, who stood over her, nervous
excitement in his voice. "Lou. Lou, wake up. Kid's comin'."
Lou started awake and jumped to her feet, the blanket slipping from her
shoulders to the floorboards at her feet. She could see Katy galloping
briskly towards the station, and without thinking, she grabbed Jimmy's
hands. "Oh, Jimmy," she breathed. He squeezed her hands so tightly
she turned to look at him, and though his chin was set as firmly as ever,
and his mouth was a straight line of calm, she could see in his eyes that
he was as anxious as she was.
It was dusk now, and Lou couldn't see Kid's face as he grew nearer.
He stopped Katy at the corral, where she stood and waited patiently as
she walked toward Lou and Jimmy. He took off his hat and turned it around
and around in his hands, clearing his throat.
"Kid, what is it?" It was Jimmy's rough voice that formed the
words for her.
"They...they found out about Jack, Lou. She was injured, and the
doc came to examine her, and the station master found out that way. He
walked in, or the doc told him, or something, I'm not sure. I couldn't
get a straight answer out of any of those boys."
"And Jack?" Lou whispered. "Where is she? How is she?"
"They don't know, Lou...they don't know."
"They don't *know*?!"
"Bart -- the station master -- got rid of her, Lou. He sent her packin';
didn't even give her her last wages. None of them knew where she'd gone."
"What the hell kind of boys *are* they?" Jimmy barked. "That
girl worked alongside them all those months and they just stood by and
watched her go?"
"Not everyone has the sense of loyalty that you do, Jimmy,"
Kid explained calmly.
"Is that all you got to say, Kid? They don't have a sense of *loyalty*?
That doesn't do Jack any good! How long has she been gone?"
Kid hesitated. "About three months."
"You see?" Lou exploded at them both. "You see? I was right.
I *knew* somethin' was wrong, and y'all just ignored me!"
"Okay, you were right, Lou. Are you happy?" snapped Jimmy.
Lou pushed him away. "Oh, yeah, Jimmy, I'm *real* happy. Jack's gone
missin' without hardly a penny to her name, none of those worthless Apple
Ridge boys have any idea where she's gone, and *we've* wasted three months
we coulda spent searchin' for her! Yeah, Jimmy, I'm just thrilled!"
Rachel came out on the porch with a bang of the screen door. "What
in the *world* is goin' on out here?" She saw the Kid standing there
and suddenly she was frightened. "Kid? Is it Jack?"
"She's gone, Rachel," Kid said simply. "The station master
found out she was a girl and fired her. No one knows where she is now."
"Oh, God," Rachel looked pale.
"How do we find her?" Lou asked rhetorically. "How are
we supposed to find her? She could be anywhere."
"Now, Lou, maybe she's all right," cautioned Kid.
"She ain't all right! I know she ain't all right! If she was all
right, I woulda heard from her by now! Haven't you listened to me at all
these past few months, Kid? The whole reason I got scared was because
I hadn't heard from her. If she was all right, she would have written
me, 'Lou, I got found out, but I'm all right'!" Lou was screaming
now.
"Oh, sugar, you have got to calm yourself." Rachel put smooth,
perfume-scented arms around the girl and held her close. "Shh. There,
there, now. Let's calm you down and we'll discuss this calmly, like level-headed
adults."
But there would be no discussing for Jimmy. He didn't follow them into the house. He sat on the porch and thought long and hard. His world had changed so much since Jack had come into their lives. Before her, his love for Lou had swallowed him whole, made him feel restless and unsettled, made him hurt so bad because she wasn't his, she belonged to someone else. Despite Lou's indignant claims that she belonged only to herself, Jimmy knew there was nothing as sure to make you belong to someone as loving them and them loving you back. He had wanted Lou so fiercely and watching her with the Kid had been his personal brand of torture.
Since Jack, all that had changed. He could pinpoint
the exact moment he knew he loved her: watching her stand there laughing
at him that day he and the Kid had raced to the barn with the two girls.
He remembered very clearly laying in the dirty puddle, looking up at Jack's
face pink with laughter, her eyes lit up, the sound of her hearty, breathless
chuckle. He loved Jack differently than he had loved Lou; it was quieter,
calmer, more soothing, and somehow consumed him twice as overwhelmingly.
Even if she didn't love
him, even if she never grew to love him, he loved her, and finding her
had suddenly become the most important thing in the world. The next morning
Jimmy was gone, and there was a short note on Lou's pillow:
Lou sat up on the bunk and read the note over and over.
If she had needed confirmation that Jimmy loved Jack, she had it right
now. Nothing had been said or even implied, but she knew Jimmy, and these
actions spoke plainly to her. The others snored around her; she, Cody,
and the Kid were to have left this morning and begun their own search
for Jack, under Teaspoon's strict instructions. She wanted to help, to
be a part of the search for the young woman who was her dearest friend,
but at the same time she knew Jimmy
was trusting her to stay behind.
Chapter 1 ¤ Chapter 2 ¤ Chapter 3 ¤ Chapter 4 ¤ Chapter 5 ¤ Chapter 6 ¤ Chapter 7 ¤ Chapter 8 ¤ Chapter 9 ¤ Chapter 10 ¤ Chapter 11 ¤ Chapter 12 ¤ Chapter 13 ¤ Chapter 14 ¤ Chapter 15 ¤ Chapter 16 ¤ Chapter 17 ¤ Chapter 18 ¤ Chapter 19 ¤ Chapter 20 ¤ Chapter 21 ¤ Epilogue ¤